It’s been a wild four years here in Americaland. Four years ago, our country elected a broke reality star as our President and look at us now. We’re crumbling more and more into a dusty pile of despair with every passing day, we’re racist, sexist, and xenophobic AF, and a lot of people we share this planet with don’t mind it.
If only Americans weren’t banned from literally everywhere, I’d buy the ones who think we’re thriving a one-way ticket out of here so they could be someone else’s problem. But that wouldn’t be fair to everywhere that isn’t America. But why do we have to deal with it?
Why does the population of Americans that believe in access to affordable healthcare, not shooting Black people, reallocating police funds to other areas that would benefit our communities, embracing immigrants, the LGBTQ+ community, our Black and Brown brothers and sisters, and women have to suffer the consequences of all of this?
It’s a shit show here. It’s wilder than a holiday get-together when your Aunt Becky is on her sixth Solo cup of Pinot grigio and rattling off about how much she loves tamales but wants to put up a border wall. And you’re just sitting there wondering what happened to her.
Americans make zero sense. And I’m talking about the ones who support Donald Trump. You don’t make sense! I’m not sorry! What happened to you! Aunt Becky!
You wanted someone in politics who has no political experience. Would you want someone shooting your rifle or driving your John Deere tractor who had no experience? Of course not. It’d be a mess! Open your eyes and step outside. I’d like to present you with Exhibit A: The American Mess.
People are voting for Trump, because they don’t like Biden. Or, better than that, they aren’t voting at all, because they don’t like Trump and they don’t like Biden.
If your Ford F250 is on fire, and you have the choice to smother the flame with a fire extinguisher or a water hose, are you going to choose neither because you don’t like fire extinguishers and you don’t like water? You’ll just let your truck burn, dangling truck nuts and all? Your little stick figure family decal? Your pine air freshener? Gone, just like that?
Perhaps this was a bad analogy, because it insinuates Donald Trump could put out the fire that is America, and he cannot, but what I am trying to say is that our country is being destroyed, and it’s our duty to elect the candidate who can and will put it out.
And that candidate is Joe Biden and his VP Kamala Harris.
And that’s just the way it is.
“But Biden smells girls’ hair!”
Yeah, and Donald Trump grabs women by the pussy, pays off porn stars, and sexually assaults women and girls, Tabitha. Find something else to focus on.
“Biden is old!”
Joe Biden is three years older than Donald Trump. The age gap between you and your fourth wife is larger than that, Bradleigh. Next.
“Kamala is a cop!”
First, I thought you loved cops? Second, does Kamala have some stuff in her past that we should pay attention to? Of course. Is “moving in on her like a bitch”, or calling deceased veterans losers, or falsely claiming every single Mexican is a rapist one of them? Nope. But nice try, Tanner.
Biden wasn’t the first choice for many of us, but we messed up by dismissing other Democratic candidates who were strong in their platforms and their actions. Not to say Biden isn’t, because he is, but we knew in advance how a lot of people would react to his candidacy. And to use your jargon, it’s deplorable.
But the reality is that Biden is the Democratic candidate we have to work with, and he is the only current viable candidate for presidency.
Donald Trump is simply not fit for office, and if I felt like being petty, I’d say not fit mentally and physically. But I’m not here to be mean or a bully, even though he is the biggest bully this nation has ever known.
Joe Biden and Kamala Harris make an excellent team, and the best part about the two of them is that they are educated in politics, they have the greater good for all Americans in their line of vision (even you, racist ones. They care about you, too.), and the platforms they share and support, they are directly connected to, making them even more passionate, educated, and proactive in their promise to help turn the United States around and point it back in the right direction.
Right now, we’re that video we’ve all seen on America’s Funniest Home Videos of the kid who hops on a four-wheeler and slams the gas without knowing the machine is in reverse while the person filming it laughs.
We’re the kid.
Our current administration is the person filming, but the kicker here is they knew we weren’t in drive this whole time.
I’m not sure what else I can say about this. I’m not sure why it’s taking so much convincing to not vote for Donald Trump. I’m not sure why it’s taking so much effort to convince you to not throw your vote away by not voting at all. If you can’t see that our current President is toxic waste, like the slime infiltrating the rainforest in FernGully, then you’re blind… and you’re blind on purpose. And that’s just unfortunate, because the Lord you pray to at the church you frequent (without your mask on) created your eyeballs from scratch in His perfect image. And He did that so you could like, use them.
He made brains, too, but that’s another article for another time.
We have to wake up. We have to see what is currently happening in our country, we have to see that there is a sliver of hope, and we have to see that we can do something about it. And that’s called voting. Voting not just for your best interest, but the interest of those you share this country with.
You’d want someone to do it for you.
A vote for Donald Trump is anti-feminist. A vote for Donald Trump is anti-Black. A vote for Donald Trump is anti-LGBTQ+. A vote for Donald Trump is anti-American.
And you love America, right?
Then vote for the candidate who will work to preserve our integrity, freedom, provide justice and equality for all, and stop embarrassing the people of the country that your great-grandparents fought for, your relatives died for, and your God created.
And that candidate is Joe Biden.
Any questions?
